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Wednesday, October 29, 2008

If I Cried...Could You Hear Me???

This is a thought I have had for a while now. I know everyone has the issues they deal with and everyone deals with them differently. I am the type of person who internalize a lot...no I am not the kind of person that will go postal, but I can honestly say very few people if any take the time listen to what is going on with me. My life is good right now and I am loving, but there are some things that have been on my mind that most people ignore. I think people are so self absorbed they do not see what is going on with the people around them...I ask the question again, If I cried could you hear me????

Friday, October 10, 2008

You have to know the whole story...

You have to know the whole story... Current mood: contemplative
I honestly do not know if I have written on this before, but it is something going on in my mind right now. I think this has become my basis for a lot of things that I feel. So many people like to judge and put you down for what you do, but they do not know they half of it. I am learning to realize that you have to know a person's history to understand why they do what they do. People are so quick to judge a person for their current actions, but the fail to look at what has gotten them to that point. For example...if your dad was a drug dealer, and your grandfather was a drug dealer...you are more than likely will be a drug dealer (I know that is not the politically correct thing to say) , but this is what you are exposed to and not to say you cannot get out the game, but if you are stuck in the game and that is all you know I believe it is harder for you to overcome, not to justify your behavior, but just looking at the bigger picture. If you were in that situation what is to say you would overcome??? If a way of life is all a person knows, sometimes it is hard to change the mentality of that person.

Another side to this is one of my biggest mottoes in life....struggle versus contentment. I think we all have struggles and we all fall short, but what about when people are content in what they are doing when it is wrong? And just because I don't flat out say I am struggling with something, does not mean that I am not struggling. But how do you deal with people who are content and do not want to change? I have been in a place in life where I did not want to change or was content in being what I was, but I had to get a wake up call one day and realize that there is a better way. I have thought about this a lot lately, especially from when you become content in your struggle and you are really not making an effort to fight.

I have pretty much said all of this to say we have to see the bigger picture, don't judge the homeless person, or the prostitute, or the crackhead, or the person who is a hot mess, but try to understand what has made them that person and that can help you help them...

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

What is the Point???

I was having an online convo with a friend the other day and I told her some things that have been going on in my mind that I have told no one. It was good to get it off my chest, at least the little I could, but it got me to thinking about the bigger picture. Why am I in the situation I am in? Why do I continue to do the same things expecting different results? I have a lot on my mind and want to share, but honestly...really don't think people or ready. I realize I think differently and feel differently than most people, but I really don't think people will understand what will come out my mouth. I try to open up, but when I do people look at me like I am crazy or do not take the time, then I back down and stop sharing. I don't see a point of sharing the thoughts if you are not willing to listen or even pretend to understand, but what is sad is that the people that are doing this are my family, my friends, the people who say they love me. You get to the point of saying what is the point of continuing to try, I mean what is the point?