The Majority

A lot has been going on in politics lately. I am not a very political person, but I like to make informed decisions when I make one. I am not a politics junkie, but it does interest me from time to time. I have been irritated a lot lately by what I have read about and seen on television. I think everyone should.

No matter what your thoughts or views are, hate is never acceptable.  What happened to civil discourse? What happened to being able to agree to disagree? Name calling is not cool and do not give me the bull about free speech. I am all for free speech, but hate speech is not good at all.

People keep saying "the majority of Americans" and this statement is getting on my last nerves!! Even if you take the argument that majority rules I honestly do not believe that the majority of Americans feel the way people are saying.  Secondly...the majority is not always right.  Back during the Civil Rights movement the majority of Americans did not want give rights to African Americans....if we used the argument of what the majority of Americans want where would be?

Health care reform is needed and the bill that was passed is not perfect, and I can even admit that I have not read everything in the bill, but most of what I have read and seen I am okay with and I have health care and have had it my whole life.  I have seen clips that interview people who are spewing out hate and they don't have informed arguments of why they are against health care. 

Just letting some thoughts out.  It is Saturday and I can't wait to enjoy the beautiful day one I am done with work.  Just a few more hours!!! Hope everyone is having a great day!!!!

Oh...extra quote that I stole from a friend on facebook...just had to post again :-)

"A woman's heart should be so hidden in Christ, that a man should have to seek Him to find her."

Missing You...

This morning I was going through my daily blog reads and I was thinking. Don't you hate it when bloggers just up and vanish? They just end their blog without any warning, nothing!!! There was one blogger that I thought had vanished, but looked back at their post and they are just on vacation because of technical difficulties for awhile...at least he let us know! 

Now I might not comment on every blog I read, trying to do better, but I do enjoy reading all of them and I do miss them when they up and vanish.  Also, I will admit I don't have a steady method to when I post, but I at least try to post at least once a week. I hate when I find great blogs and their posts are weeks and sometimes even months apart!

Okay, done with my vent for the day. Has any one had this experience? Are there any blogs that you wonder what happened?  Just my thoughts!

Living on the Edge!!

I was told by a friend recently that I was too conservative and that I need to live on the edge...this got me to thinking. Do I?  I can admit that I am conservative and do not do things that most people do, but I truly enjoy my life and the things I do.  I do have a wild side which most people don't get to see because honestly....they choose to ignore it.  There are some things that I would like to do that might be considered living on the edge...but I am afraid.  I honestly don't know if I will ever do them, but they are things that cross my mind on a regular basis.  Listed below are a few of those things.

1. I want to get a tattoo on the back of my neck. Something small, but cute. I have had the design picked out for a year. I want it where it can be covered up while I am at work, but seen when I am out at play.  My hair is long again...we will see.
2. I want to go up and talk to a complete stranger. This may sound weird, but for me it is not. I do not talk to strangers...honestly. If you speak to me I will speak to you, but just to talk and live it up with a random person...never done.
3. I want to just get up one day and take a road trip...to where I have no clue. I just want to pack my bags and go. Just see where the open road and my GPS takes me.
4. I want to get another piercing on my body....where is a surprise ;-) I have had my nose pierced twice, my eyebrow, and my tongue pierced.  I love piercings!!  But now that I am an adult (even though I had my nose re-pierced a few years ago) and work in a corporate setting it makes it kind of hard now.
5. This may sound crazy, but I want to get drunk with out being drunk. I guess be loose of any inhibitions. I have never been drunk in my life. I truly hate when people are sloppy drunk, but I just want to do it, but still have control...which does not make sense, but I hope you get my point.
6. One day I want to be free to say WHATEVER is on my mind.  Screw who agrees or disagrees.  I just want to be able to express my thoughts and feelings without worrying how it will be taken by other people.

Okay...I think these are few things that I consider "living on the edge" for me.  What are some things that you think are "living on the edge"? What are some things you would do if you had no fear? Some of things on this list I honestly doubt I will ever do, but they have crossed my mind.  Some things I realistic, and some I have not listed because I am still formulating them in my mind.

Is it really love???

This morning I woke up and I had the same headache I have been having every morning for about a week. I am really thinking about not going to work this morning because I feel just that bad.  I eventually made it to work (guess I now have the energy to finish this blog post).  Yesterday at church the sermon hit me where it hurt and I truly needed that. It was confirmation on a lot of things I have been dealing with and I know what I am supposed to do now.

One thing that is getting to me is this four letter word....LOVE.  This is something we all desire and hopefully something that we all give.  But my concern is do people truly understand love? What do people really think what love is? I really believe that people take love for granted.

I have been dealing with feelings of love for a certain person. I love this person and want the best for this person...but I don't want to be with the person. Which is hard to understand for me.  I have thought about and processed it over and over. I love this person with all my heart. I want the best for them, I want them happy, and I want to see them prosper.  I love spending time with them, I love the way they look...but the desire to be with them. People force us together in their minds, and I have honestly pondered the idea based off what other people have said.  I realize I can not be who others want me to be and I can't be with someone just because others think you would make a "cute couple."

These are the thoughts that have been on my mind lately.  Still trying to figure things out....

I messed up :-(

I messed up. I have made a lot of mistakes lately and I am trying to correct them.  I have not been writing like I use to because of my mistakes.  Today is a day of reckoning...We will see what happens. I am at fault, I have to except the consequences.  I have not hit rock bottom, but I have learned a valuable lesson.  No matter the outcome I am blessed. I think about what other people have to go through in life and what I am dealing with does not compare. 

All I can say at the moment....not sad, but not glad either, at this point.

Issues from last night....

Last night was an interesting night for me....I did something that I usually don't do and in same ways this morning I am still asking myself why did I do it.  Last night I went to a griefshare group at my church.  They had announced it a while ago and I decided I would go to see what insite or see if I can learn better ways with dealing with grief and  the issues I have from the deaths of closed loved ones. Needless to say my experience last night was somewhat helpful...but still not what I expected.

I am the first to admit that I have issues and maybe I make things issues that should not be. Last night I had several issues and I tried to see past them, but it was very hard.

1. Location of session was at the original church...which is not in the best neighborhood. Session was at 7pm at night...just say I saw 3 or 4 people that made me lock my door while waiting and some that had clear mental illnesses. The safety of the location is really making me not want to go back.
2. As soon as I got in the people leading the session scared me...Like I said in previous posts I sit and observe people and sometimes I just don't get good vibes.
3. I really don't like when people like to hear themselves talk.  I know you are trying to get a point across...but some things are just not necessary!
4. I HATE bad English. Is it too much to ask to speak correctly? Subject/Verb agreement is not too hard. I can't concentrate and listen to someone when the way the speaks gets on my last nerve?
5. If you speak for 30 minutes (which I do not think is part of the program), then say we will watch a 30 minute video (which was longer than 30 minutes), then say we will have a 15 minute discussion (which took 40 minutes...and it was mostly her the leader talking)...My time is valuable! Plus look back to issue #1...do not want to be in that neighborhood that late at night.
6. I know I am weird and I don't talk to strangers (my mom taught me at an early age). Some people truly do scare me...that is all I will say to that.
7. I know my life experiences are different than others, but it does get frustrating when

Okay. I have listed my issues from last night.  They might be valid...might just be me frustrated with the situation last night, but those are things that I felt. I wrote all this to get out my thoughts. I know people might not think the way I do or feel the same way about situations...but that does not negate my feelings and thoughts.  Sometimes I wish people would be more understanding even when they might not think or feel the same way that I do....all I have to say.

Have You Ever Just Observed People?

Yesterday I was mentoring my teenagers and during the session when they were working in groups I just stood back and observed the people in the room.  I tend to do this a lot. Just like watching people and seeing how they interact with others. I love observing people when they have no clue that I am watching so that they don't change their behaviors and their actions. 

When I was observing a lot of things were going on in my mind. I often times get frustrated when I mentor because I care so much. I get frustrated with the adults because they sit around and do nothing and I get frustrated with the kids because they just don't get it. But out of my frustration I also get inspiration of how to change the existing mentality of the people that I am observing. If you see a problem....try to help fix it.

By no means do I think I have the ability to change a person, but I can, I think all people can help encourage growth in others.  I know personally I am not the same person I was a few years ago and I think differently which I think is a good thing and I got to this point by broadening my experiences and my perspective on things. How can I help someone if I can't understand or be able to reach them where they are?

Observations give you better insight and also help you understand more about a person or a situation.  Observations can be positive and negative, but they all work together to help see the bigger picture.