Monday, October 12, 2009

To feel or not to feel....

This weekend I had a lot of fun, but also came to a conclusion in my life about a very hard subject in my life. I am not in a relationship right now....but I do have feelings for two people. I have never been in this place before. What is crazy is that one of the people I could be with if I truly wanted to...but I know that in the long run that me and that person could never be together. The other person I honestly do not know if they feel the same way, but I can't help my feelings about that person. Lets call them person #1 and person # 2...

Person #1 is a great friend. They have my back and we connect on so many levels. There is a physical attraction and an emotional attraction....problem is we are two different people who live in 2 different worlds. We have fun together one on one. We can talk about almost anything. This person knows a lot more about me than most people. My question becomes does my feelings for this person supersede my feelings for others or how others view me? I don't live for others, but me being with this person would cause a rift in several areas in my life.

Person #2 is very similar to person #1....and might even know more about me than person #1. We connect on a different level. We are exact opposites, but alike in so many ways. Once again one on one we are an awesome duo. We have flaws and we accept each other for who we they like me the way that I like them....not sure. I mean they know me in and out and the know what I expect from love yet they can't show it to me??? I know this person cares for me, if they felt like I felt all they would have to do is say something...SAY SOMETHING!!!! I don't know if I am reading into statements that have been said.

I just don't know what to do. I am at the point where I just want an answer...yes or no. If we will not be, I can put it out of my mind and move on.

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