Affirmation of a Parent.

This morning my mother and I had our usual early morning conversation.  I was venting frustrations about my job and just talked about plans for today.  What surprised me were the words she said in the midst of our conversation.  The more I think about those words, the more I am like WOW!!!

Does not matter what she said, but what she made me think about is how the words of a mother, words of a parent can mean so much. The affirmation of a parent can do magnificent things.  I began to think about what I can do and what I will do in the near future just because of a few words.

I also thought about the amount of children and even adults to this day who do not get affirmation from their parents and who still seek affirmation from their parents in so many ways....and not all of them good. Can you even imagine what a child can or would have become if their parent(s) told them what they could do? Can you imagine how many children would not be out in the world seeking negative attention just to get affirmation from people who truly don't love them because the people that were supposed to love them ignored them?

These are just my thoughts from a small, but meaningful conversation I had this morning. I am thankful for my mother and all that she has taught me and instilled in me.  More than she will ever know. I now think about and pray about the people who are still longing for the affirmation of a parent.

Kids on Youtube...Please be a parent!!!!

This morning when I came into work I was checking my facebook account and was looking at the various links that some of my friends posted. I did not plan on writing a blog this early....but was inspired, or better yet disturbed at what I saw, or what I have been seeing.

There were two videos of children, no toddlers, no BABIES....doing outrageous things. I was like are you serious? I mean it is not funny, it is not cute, it is actually sad. I mean why do adults, I would say parents, but to me parents would not let their children be encouraged for foolishness, record and post this stuff online??? They want 15 minutes of fame?

Now I am all for positive images and encouraging children to use their gifts and talents. I am all for entertainment that is funny, but to let a child do whatever? To show a child that obviously doing something bad and encouraging the behavior? I remember back in the day there was joke that said it was sad that a child could tootsie roll, but could not read....the tradition still goes. But why????

Why is a ghetto mindset encouraged...and sad to say this not a "black" issue. I have seen youtube clips of all races of kids. Then we wonder what is wrong with society or what is wrong with kids today. Seeing a baby in a diaper drop it like it is hot is not cute. Seeing a child curse out their parent or another child is not cute. Seeing two children grinding on each other is not cute. Seeing a child curse out their parent is not cute. Seeing a child hit or fight someone else is not cute.

Okay....I think I am done venting. To end on a positive note. A positive clip on youtube. These boys are too cute. They are singing and enjoying a Popsicle...then running of to jump on trampoline...what kids should be doing at that age.

Shocked by what is right

I had trouble with this title, but it finally come up with something, but not too happy...open to suggestions. A lot of times when we see people doing what is right we are shocked...I think one person said it best was Chris Rock in his HBO special. When a man wants props for taking care of his kids...that is what you are supposed to do. I pay my bills on time...that is what you are supposed to do. These are just a couple of examples of things that people want recognition for, but in a sense that is what you are supposed to do. There are few things that stick out in my mind about when people are shocked by what is right.

I have a friend who is married and I love her and her husband (just using him as one example...I have more). I had a conversation with a person and I used her husband as an example. Her husband is caring, smart, great friend, great husband, and so much more. When I describe him sometimes I feel as if he is the exception...not the norm. People are amazed when we talk about his qualities because they are so rare, but he is only doing what he is supposed to do. I am not saying he is perfect and I do not compare other men to him, but to me he is a role model as a husband, friend, black man, man, just human being in general. He lives a life as an example which a lot of people do not do.

Another area where people are shocked at what is right is kids...You see kids that have great manners, respectful, and behaving and you find that shocking. So many kids today are not being raised by their parents, they are left to do whatever, and are given no structure. This leads to a lot of problems. When I was growing up I was not a perfect child and I did not have perfect parents, but there were expectations and if I acted a fool...my parents acted a fool. When I was growing up I use to ask my parents for money for good grades...their response was you do not get paid for what you are supposed to do. I think this concept is lacking with today's parents and kids. I think you have so many kids out of control today that when you see a kid acting semi right you are so surprised...this is not right.

I am pretty sure there are several more examples, but these are just a couple that stick out to me.

The Struggle Within

Within me there is a constant struggle to do what is right. I mean it is a struggle that goes against everything that I have been taught and I have been fed my whole life. Have I lived my life a lie? Have I become what others want me to be just to get by in life?? I know I have issues, we all do, but will I be able to come. My father died still dealing with his, I don't want this to happen to me. I want to be able to conquer this. I mean why do I have to learn the hard way? I mean I knew I should not have introduced it into my spirit, but it is there now and I am having the hardest time letting go. A friend made a statement yesterday, or rather an action, and it made it even worse. She meant to do me no harm, but it did. She does not realize how I internalize statements like that. Is this a phase I am going through??? I honestly don't know, but I am constantly asking my self why, why, why. I mean it should be simple to just stop thinking about it, but I can't, I can't. If I could I would, but I can't. Life is so interesting. This struggle within is consuming my thoughts, my mind, and my soul. Can I let it go, or will it always be a part of me?