Wednesday, December 10, 2008

You Can't Change Me

This is a statement people need to realize. Let people be who they are because you can't change them. I think people try to hard to change people...rarely does it work. I am not saying you can't help people improve, but they have to want to. In relationships, friendships, and with family members people have this idea of how people are supposed to be and when they do not fit that mold they get upset, why? Everyone is different and everyone is unique, let people be who they are. I am not saying allow people to be trifflin or not to encourage people to do better, but don't feel that you can change a person. People are who they are for a reason, good or bad. People need to learn how to see this and work with it and not be consumed by a person who does not change to what they want them to be.

I think too many people, men and women, get into relationships and feel they can change the person they are with. If he was an ass when you met him, what makes you think he will not be an ass while you are together? If she did not have a work ethic before you started dating what makes you think she is going to work hard when you get together? To me there are certain qualities of people that make them who they are rather you like it or not, love it or leave it. I am not saying people can not grow or become better people, but I think it has to start with them and no matter what you do you can't force a person to change unless they want to do it themselves.

I wrote a blog a while ago entitled Just Do you.... and I talked about people just being themselves. People should not try to fit the mold people have made for them or try to fit in with certain people out of their own insecurities. People change for so many reasons but a lot of times they do not have the right motives. I am who I am, I love me, so what if you don't like me oh well. I think our differences make the world interesting. If everyone was the same or fit the mold that others put them in I think the world would be a very dull place.

I wrote this all this to say you can't change me and I can't change who you are and love it despite what others say.


Jervis said...

thats the greatest challenge in the world, ACCEPTING OTHERS

Brothers Blog said...

i agree with this so much. I always tell people they can't change me and I can't change them. Especially the older you get the more set in your ways you are. So if you're going to deal with them on whatever level it may be friendship, relationship, family, just accept them as they are. If they change they will do so when they want to or feel the need to.

Unknown said...

I've made that mistake a few times...misreading someone as the type that can be "molded". For some strange reason though, I still think I have the ability to help people in a positive way, therefore inflicting some type of change. me crazy

Humbly Beautiful said...

I feel everyones comments. We have to learn to accept others, just like you would want to people to accept you. I do like the word help though, but to me helping is not changing. When you help someone you have done all you can do it and it is up to them to take it from there.