My Experience at the Jewish Temple

This weekend was interesting. I went to the Jewish Temple with my former boss who was Jewish (guess you knew that). I enjoyed the service and it was a first for me.  I have never really ventured out into other faiths and religions in my life. I was brought up in the Christian faith and predominately in the African American church and it is a part of me and is responsible for who I am today.

One thing I did like were the prayer books and the recitations. Once I figured out what they were saying and singing I enjoyed it. It was interesting the history that I was shown and the knowledge of her faith that was portrayed.

Knowledge about what you believe in is something that has been getting to me lately.  Having an educated faith....sometimes the more I learn the more I question, but I still realize I know what I believe in. I then think back to my older family members who did not have the education, but believed and live a life that I admire and was devoted to God.

Another struggle with my faith....

Day 18: Something you collect (Finally Caught Up!)

Key chain collection I have had since like 7th grade. You see the Adidas hat??? Classic!

Day 17: A representation of the you no one really knows (Saturday's Post)

Just because I am waiting till marriage does not mean I don't have a wild side....all I will say ;-)

(can't believe I just posted this)

Day 16: Your closet (Friday's post)

Kind of messy....rough weekend, was supposed to clean out this weekend, but slept the weekend away. I needed it.

Update on 30 while 30

Decided to do an accountability check on my list....updates are in pink :-)

1. Get a tattoo (I will not punk out!) Can't do until hair grows back out.....just got cut
2. Get my passport (overseas trip is not in the budget YET....but working on it, at least I can get prepared) Have not even started
3. Go on a date Ha! Thought I would get this accomplished recently, but I think I am becoming delusional. Why do I have to approach a guy????
4. Complete 30 random acts of kindness to strangers I have done a few things....but I don't think I can give an accurate count
5. Read 30 books that aren't the typical books that I enjoy 3 books down (I need to step it up)
6. Take a spontaneous road trip somewhere by myself, just wake up and go (I have to plan out everything....this is going to be hard) Not in budget right now, think I will do this summer
7. Go white water rafting I have not even planned this out yet....
8. Apply to Masters of Public Health Program (2 are on the radar) Studying for GRE has in full force and list is now 3 schools, one with a dual program ;-)
9. Write letters to 30 people who have had an influence in my life and tell them why Written parts of letters, but have not mailed off
10. Run (not walk) a 5K so far I have failed on this one....still trying
11. Walk the Music City Half Marathon (still praying on this one....Jesus give me strength!!!) need to find a running group, this is in April...JESUS!!!
12. Save X amount of money (figure will not be disclosed to everyone, but will tell if it is met or not) Started saving, still not a lot, but doing a lot better.
13. Donate hair to Locks for Love (length is almost there!) Hair is ready to be shipped off, Mailing in the morning :-)
14. Lose at least 30 pounds (aiming for more....but sticking with the theme of 30)  I have lost 15 pounds, but a way to go....want to lose more than 30 pounds
15. Purchase a Home (or be in the process...working on that now) still want too, but some things have come up....not a bad thing, but change in life, house might have to be put on hold, but in the long rung will be better
16. Become a Research Coordinator (next step in my career...making moves!) Should know very soon
17. Travel west of the Mississippi River (been to Arkansas and Missouri, but that is about it...but have been to all the states east of the Mississippi) Maybe this summer
18. Purchase a big ticket item for my mother (have to see what she wants....I am thinking a REAL nice pair of earrings...this will be a surprise) Bought her roses for her birthday....not big enough yet
19. Clean out my wardrobe (closet full of clothes and shoes...don't wear half of them, shame!!!) have not even started :-(
20. Visit the graves of my father and sister (have not done since the funerals) Nope (plus I have to add grandmother to list)
21. Ask some tough questions of a family member (nothing bad....just unanswered questions) plan to do during holidays
22. Learn how to knit, love to crochet, everytime I try knitting I get frustrated :-( I think I am going to sign up for a class. Teaching myself has not worked.
23. Write the vision plan for the next big project in my life (can't tell you what it is...yet) working on that now, got revelation recently now I have to put it down in writing and in action
24. Go to a concert in a big venue (don't do crowds of people well, which is limiting me from seeing Maxwell in July...not cool) U2 is coming to Vandy....but this is not what I was thinking about
25. Have my first kiss (yes I said it....don't trip) You got jokes!
26. Create a signature vegan dish for me (I love to cook...want to create something that people who are skeptical about vegan and vegetarian dishes will enjoy) made these cupcakes I love....but it was not "it"
27. Complete a financial plan that will pay of my student loans before I die (I am so serious) working on it
28. Purchase a piece of artwork that will be handed down to my next generation nope
29. Learn to speak my mind with no fear of others (some people might think I already do this....if you only knew!!) I have tried, been still get looked at crazy and no one understands, becomes frustrating, oh well
30. Most important thing to do in my year of 30..... HAVE FUN!!!! ALWAYS!!!!

Just Too Much

Recently I have had a lot of things dumped on me this past week. From emotional, spiritual, professional, and so on....Been a rough week, but thank God things are looking up.  I know God has a reason for everything even when I don't know or see the reason.

Recently I deactivated my facebook account....needed a break and it was consuming me (not to the extreme, but it was taking up a lot of my time). I am taking some time to get some things right in my life that I have been procrastinating on in my life.

I so wish I can say more, but until some things play out really can't talk much about specifics. I am learning to be more proactive than reactive.  Can't always be on the defense, time to play offense....

Hope everyone had a great week!

For those who have not seen the new cut hear it is :-)

Will do photo challenge when I get home (forgot to take pic of my closet this morning)

Day 15: A stranger and why you chose them

First person I could take a picture of without them noticing

Day 14: Something you craved today

For people to do more of this....

Anonymous Comments

Recently I have had several anonymous comments. This use to not bother me, but I can admit now it does, just by the nature of the comments I have received.  The person obviously follows me on facebook and twitter, and has now asked me questions on formspring (rare thing).

I am assuming that this the same person because of the nature of questions and comments, and honestly I might be wrong. No matter if the person is the same or not I have no problem with what they were saying if they could back up what they are saying....and so far they have not.

Because of this I have prevented anonymous comments. Wish I did not have too, oh well.  I am open for discussion an dialogue, but please back up your statements.

Obviously this person follows me on twitter and facebook and if I am correct is asking the formspring questions so they can still respond, just not anonymously.

Am I being too harsh?

Day 13: The town/city you reside

Nashville, TN

Day 12: What’s in your fridge

Just got back in town....need to go grocery shopping :-)

Maybe I can go without Facebook???

This weekend I had a great time with friends while visiting Atlanta. What was funny for the first time in a while I really paid no attention to facebook and very little attention to twitter. I usually update my facebook status 1-2 a day and twitter a lot more, but this weekend when I checked facebook on Sunday evening I hadn't updated since Thursday. 

I use to be a constant facebook user, updating all the time and checking out all the pictures and status updates of all my friends. This weekend I had no desire to and even when I got home I did not go back to check what I missed. I am very proud of myself for this accomplishment....and it was not even on purpose.

Do I think I will ever get rid of my facebook page, doubt it, but I am not addicted to it as I use to be.  I love what facebook has done by connecting people I have not seen in years or people I have lost contact with. I think it is a great way to meet up with old classmates when you are visiting cities and to get updates on them from time to time.

I do believe I am going to continue to migrate more to twitter and maybe even let me people know about my twitter page....we shall see.

Last thing I have to slowly pull myself away from on facebook are the games. I love playing them, but need to get away from that also. We shall see :-)

Day 11: Your family pet(s) – if you don’t have one, take a picture of anything

No family pets :-( This is a picture of a project I did in a training this week. Didn't take any pics today....busy day.

Day 10: TV show you’re currently addicted to

I so love this show!

Day 9: A place you went today

Beautiful scene on my road trip this weekend :-)

The Big Chop!!!

Some of you who follow my blog may know that I am working on 30 things to do while 30 list. Well yesterday I scratched off #13!!!!! That was growing my hair long enough and cutting it and donating it to Locks for Love. This was a big deal for me because I HATE cutting my hair. I love the option of having a ponytail and right now I do not. It is not as short as I thought it would be, but it is the shortest my hair has ever been. Below are the pictures of the process.

First she had to wash and flat iron my hair. This it is in a ponytail before the big chop.

She then cut the ponytail off. Still kind of shocked that much hair was left.

I then put the hair in a bag to mail off for Locks for Love!

Lastly, she styles my hair and I go home!

My hair will grow back and I have to keep telling myself that. I am more than my hair, but oh how I love my hair.  Now once my hair grows back I can accomplish #1 on my list....get a tattoo!!!

Day 8: Something you dislike

Car Accident in 2003.  I loved the car, but hated what happened to it. But thank GOD I survived!

Day 7: Something you ate today

Yoplait Whips Light Peaches & Cream Yogurt, Red Seedless Grapes, & Tazo Passion Tea (bought my own box, Starbucks can't keep getting my money!)

Lost Hope (might be rambling.....sorry)

This morning (or night....considering I woke up at 2 am) I started thinking about some things going on in my life. Last night I sent a text to one of my friends saying that I had given up hope.....that is not good.  Think I wrote about the convo before, but something I said and something he said has stuck in my mind. I said I had given up hope on guys and he said don't give up hope....I then rephrased my statement, but the more I think about it I really think that is what I meant.

I have written about relationships, men, and my past (the fact that I have never dated), but recently the more I think about it or the more I hope, the more I lose hope. I am one not to let past experience taint future ones, but when you keep doing the same thing and expecting different results....that is insanity. About a month ago I truly thought about all the male relationships in my life from father, family members, friends, professional, and so on and they all have not been good, so I begin to question....all men can't be bad????

I mean what is was wrong with desiring positive male relationships? I mean why do men continue to let me down.  I honestly do not ask for much and only expect people to treat others how they want to be treated, but if how you treat me is the way you want to be treated, that is very sad. I can even take my best male friend, I love him I do, but I really think he does not feel the same way, or at least I don't think his actions show it. He has my back when I am down, but does he go out the way or think about me unless I am in need, nope.

Sometimes I think I care too much. I think I expect people to be unselfish...HA! I might even think people to act like me, but I realize that is not going to happen.  I realize I care too much and I try not to care, but it is not that simple, to me it is like turning off who I am. 

I hate to admit it, but right now my hope is lost, I hope it returns, but I can't continue to be let down. I can't continue to hope that a man will be a man.  I honestly do not think that is too much to ask....but recently I think it is.

A couple of days ago I had a twitter post....

refuses to believe that all men suck....but right now someone would have a very hard time proving me different

Still waiting for someone to prove me different....

Day 6: Your humble abode

Forgot to take a picture as I was leaving out this morning....These are my apartments :-) Next year a house!

Day 5: What’s in your bag? Or something you can’t leave the house without

I have done the picture of my purse before so I decided to post what I can't leave the house without. I love my EVO! I am addicted to my phone and what it does for me.



Day 4: A representation of your day – what do you do?

It is Sunday so I was at church, but forgot to take a picture :-( But I did spend time mentoring and my mentee took this picture of me trying on funny glasses (she refused to let me take a picture of her in glasses). Hot pink "Dewayne Wayne" glasses...I know you remember the flip top! I love to mentor and I think all people should :-)

HBCU vs. Majority Institutions

As I chill this morning I decided to have a movie day and the first movie I decided to watch was School Daze. It is one of my favorite movies and I had not watched it in a while. I watch if for entertainment, education, and enlightenment. 

Most of you who read my blog know that I did not go to an HBCU (Historically Black College or University), but I went to Vanderbilt University. I am proud of my education and my experience and I would not take it back for the world, but when I watch School Daze I sometimes wonder would me life be different if I went to a HBCU. Majority of my older family members and family friends graduated from HBCUs such as Spelman, Morehouse, Lincoln, and Knoxville College. Although I can appreciate what they have done in the Black community and continue to do I still realize it was not for me.

Recently there was an article on 16 year old child prodigy that chose FAMU over Harvard. After reading the article the young boy made a very informed decision about where he chose to go to college which a lot of people do not.  I think students have to realize what is best for them, which may or may not be a HBCU.

I think the important thing is to get an education and get a job. You should also be able to enjoy your college experience. College is more than books, you should have fun and socialize too. One thing about me going to Vanderbilt, although I did not attend an HBCU I had 4 HBCUs (Meharry, Tennessee State, Fisk, & American Baptist College) in the city which exposed me to some of the Black College experience....that was enough for me.

Just my thoughts, not an expert, but just how I see things. I will not continue to watch the end of School Daze......


WAKE UPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!
 (had to do it)

Day 3: Something you bought today

 

I went grocery shopping today! This is just what's in the freezer. I HAVE to stop eating out so much and cooking at home.

Day 2: Someone I Adore

My Aunt Mary (and me....my younger days)

5 reasons why I adore her

1. The life she lived
2. The unconditional love she gave
3. Her desire to live for God and study the Bible
4. She worked hard her whole life
5. Her ability to make me smile no matter what

Day 1: Self Portrait

Earlier today I decided to participate in the 31 Day Photo Challenge. This will not take the place of my blogging, but show you some pictures of my world....Hope you enjoy!

Guess who this is? Me!!!!

I refuse to introduce myself again....If you read my blog you know me.

Black Marriage Negotiations

This video was posted by a friend yesterday on facebook. I did not comment, because I had no words. Then several of my male friends reposted (surprisingly it was posted by unrelated friends). I sometimes feel that I am naive in the world, because I can't believe that a lot of women think like this. I get frustrated because most of the qualities this woman says she wants in a man or not want, most women I know don't think like that.

I am pretty sure this video was made by a guy, because it puts the black woman in a bad light, I wonder if a woman will make a counter video....that would be interesting. One of my friends said it best.....if you want to marry Beyonce, then you need to become Jay-Z.

But based on this video I decided to list some of the things that I want in a mate. Also made a list of things that are not important that some men feel woman want. List is not all inclusive, but some things that I desire. A while ago I wrote a list of about 30 specific things that I want in a mate, and the few friends that I told about the list asked were the things superficial....and my answer was no. (although there are some things that I want that are superficial, but they are not deal breakers, just playful wishes...like someone who can sing).

Ask if you want more detail, tried to keep characteristics short

Wants:

1. Intelligent (does not necessarily mean college educated)
2. Wise
3. Caring
4. God fearing
5. Be willing to wait for marriage to have sex
6. Knows purpose and working in it
7. Fun
8. Good money manager
9. Giving
10. Able to Communicate
11. Able to take the lead
12. Compatible with each other
13. Healthy
14. Supportive, as I am supportive to you (I got your back, you got mine!)

Not Important:

1. I don't care how much money you make
2. Looks are not important (although I have to be able to look at you)
3. What you do for a living (as long as it is legal and ethical and does not compromise what I stand for)
4. I don't have to take charge, I am so down for you being the lead
5. Your past, as long as you have changed (if it was bad)
6. What kind of car you drive
7. Rather you are college educated or not

These are just a few things that came in my mind after watching this video and past experiences.

What are some of the qualities you possess in a mate?

31 Day Photo Challenge

This morning as I was catching up on my blogs from last night I was inspired to do another blog challenge....but this one is with pictures. I stole from Blu Flame Blvd. and I will love posting and explaining old pictures and some new ones I take with my great phone (although I have a great digital camera, I am loving the convenience of a great camera phone). 

During this challenge I will try to continue to blog about the things going on in my world and in my head, last blog challenge I was not good at that, but a lot was going on at the time.  I will start later on today (still in my pajamas and head scarf which is not a good look for a self portrait.)

Hope you enjoy!

 

* Day 1: Self portrait – share basics/make an intro.
* Day 2: Someone you adore – 5 reasons why
* Day 3: Something you bought today
* Day 4: A representation of your day – what do you do?
* Day 5: What’s in your bag? Or something you can’t leave the house without
* Day 6: Your humble abode
* Day 7: Something you ate today
* Day 8: Something you dislike
* Day 9: A place you went today
* Day 10: TV show you’re currently addicted to
* Day 11: Your family pet(s) – if you don’t have one, take a picture of anything
* Day 12: What’s in your fridge
* Day 13: The town/city you reside
* Day 14: Something you craved today
* Day 15: A stranger and why you chose them
* Day 16: Your closet
* Day 17: A representation of the you no one really knows
* Day 18: Something you collect
* Day 19: Favorite part of yourself and why
* Day 20: A hobby you have
* Day 21: Your parents
* Day 22: Your room as it is right now
* Day 23: Go some where you’ve never been & take a picture
* Day 24: Something you find funny
* Day 25: Self portrait myspace-esque
* Day 26: Where you go to relax/get away
* Day 27: Something that gives you purpose
* Day 28: A before & after shot of anything
* Day 29: An action shot
* Day 30: Another self portrait
* Day 31: Something that always makes you smile

God's Work vs. Church Work

This was a post I wanted to write last Sunday, but just did not have the energy to do it.  I made a status on facebook a while ago...Not all church work is God's work and that got some of my friends to thinking....even got me to thinking. Sometimes I feel that we get so  busy doing work for the church we miss what God wants us to do.

What do I mean? I think, or I observe that people get so busy do work in the church they do not go out and help and be an example to others.  Sometimes I am out and I see people that I go to church with and I attempt to say hello although I might not know their name and they don't even speak back. 

Some people's lives revolve around church, but not God. They take no time out for themselves, their social lives all revolve around church and church people.  They are not well rounded.  They put their faith in the man at the pulpit and look to him as their God.  This is not good.

I think the world would be a much better place if people would not put all their focus on church work and think about God's work.

Rough Week

I don't know why, but this week has been a rough week. Everyday I have meant to post something, but I can't. I have topics in mind, ideas to vent about, but when it came down to writing I just couldn't.  It was not a sad week, not really a busy week, but just a blah week. 

I don't know if I am in a funk, if I am I think I am coming out of it.  I don't know if the thoughts in my head are just all over the place that I can't narrow it down to one topic.  I just don't know. I think I will post a few things this evening, some things are in draft mode, some are formulated in my head and just need to get thoughts out. 

Hopefully this weekend I will get thoughts out and enjoy the weekend. We shall see...